


peter parker imagines

by petersmemes



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hope you enjoy!!, Irondad, Stark!Reader, Whump, lot's of stark!reader, peter parker fics, peter parker imagine, peter parker oneshots, some of - Freeform, the avengers imagines, the avengers x reader - Freeform, this is a collection of fics from my tumblr!!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-14 01:53:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16483829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petersmemes/pseuds/petersmemes
Summary: just a collection of fics originally posted on my tumblr!! (-:





	1. home movies and i love yous.

**Author's Note:**

> hello, my lovely friends!! these are a collection of fics originally posted on my tumblr but i decided to cross-post them here as well!! feel free to leave requests or comments on the chapters!!  
> hope you enjoy!! also please be patient!! the fics in the beginning aren't the greatest, but i swear that they will get better!! <3

orginally posted: 3-17-18

Growing up with your family was not something you took for granted. You were surrounded by aunts and uncles who cared deeply for you, and treated you like their own child. Your father had his faults, but he was always there for you and loved you to pieces. But growing up with the Avengers came with a price though, home movies.

No one knew who took the first one, but suddenly your upbringing was filled with cameras constantly shoved in your face. You didn’t mind when you were younger, but as you started to mature and blossom into a teenage girl, you hated it. As much as you told your family to back off and get a life, they would still record the snippets of your life. These videos were stored in a folder on your father’s computer, saving them for a day when he needed to reminisce about the past or god forbid something happens to you and he needed to be reminded of the way you laughed.

On a chilly September night, Peter Parker stumbled into your life, quite literally. He accidentally knocked you over and fell on top of your sprawled out body. Your faces were inches from each other, eyes locked in attraction neither one of you saying anything, just taking in the others raw beauty. Peter finally came to moments later, stuttering an apology to you and extending a helping hand to lift you off the floor. Ever since that encounter, you and Peter were inseparable, where ever either one of you was spotted, the other was always nearby.

Peter Parker was your first love, your love felt unstoppable. The two of you had your relationship pushed to the limits due to him being a superhero and constantly risking his life to save others. Time after time, you were masked in a blanket of anxiety and fear not being able to shake off the feeling that your lover could be in an alleyway, dead. But you were constantly proven wrong, Peter always came back, just like he promised. Peter Parker never broke his promises to you.

Your family approved of this relationship, no one was really keen on the idea of you dating though, but they were happy it was with a kid they trusted with their lives. Even your father approved of it, though wary of it at some points but he could feel the overwhelming amounts of love and care between the two teenagers. He knew it was serious and the two of you might just be in for the long run.

Tony Stark wasn’t frazzled by much, but the thought of his little princess growing up terrified him. He could remember the day you came into his life like it was yesterday. Your floppy hair poking up through a blanket, a lopsided grin on your chubby little face, and the feeling of needing to protect this child with all of his strength, he was not going to let anything ever harm you. 

Friday nights were movie nights in the tower, everyone knew this. It was their moment of peace, their moment of domesticity in their normally hectic lives. It was their chance to relax and catch up with their family, to act normal. No one would miss this event for the world. It had been an exhausting, excruciating week for every member of the team including you. A battle had risen in the heart of the city and the Avengers needed every hand on deck, including yours. Normally, you were to stay miles away from any danger, though you were a skilled fighter none of the team could risk having you be compromised. You weren’t a hero per say like the rest of them, you were a teenage girl who just so happened to be able to take down anyone in your way. When you had received the call to action, you were excited to say the least. Excited to finally put your skills to the test, to find out what you were really made of. You were also excited to see your family in action.

You wanted to see your uncle Steve use his shield.

You wanted to see your aunt Natasha hurt some bitches.

You wanted to see your uncle Sam use his little baby drone, that you swore he sometimes loved more than you.

The one thing you did not want to do was see the love of your life in battle, but you had to push the thoughts out the way and concentrate on the matter at hand.

The battle went smooth.

Well actually, the battle went smoothish.

Everything was fine up until the last second when you almost drowned. That was just the highlight of your day. One second you were fine, standing by your family’s side down by the river, and the next you were submerged under the freezing water, sucking in liters of water, unable to receive the sweet oxygen you had been craving. Seconds felt like hours as you struggled against the force of the bad guy.

You couldn’t breathe.

You were going to die, but you couldn’t accept this so you continued to fight.

Thank god you did because you were freed from the release of your captor and trusted up from the water. But this wasn’t the end of the pain and terror, your vision was clouded and your lungs were filled to the brim with water, unable to get the oxygen. Your family gathered around your limp body as they watched from the side as your father started compressions on your chest, not stopping until you coughed up the water in your lungs.

Peter Parker couldn’t watch this happen, his view shielded by a protective arm that belonged to Wanda. She didn’t want the teenager to watch, in fear he might watch the one person he cared most about die, just like everyone else he loved. The team was preparing themselves in one way or another, for the fact that they might be watching the final moments of Y/N Stark. The girl they watched grow up and the girl that they might watch die. But you were strong, and you refused to let your body give up when it wanted to. You fought the looming death and fought for your right to live.

You coughed that water right out of your lungs.

That was Wednesday, and now it was Friday. Movie night. Everyone crowded into the room that Tony had dedicated to movie nights. It was littered with couches and chairs and fluffy blankets. There was room for everyone in front of the endlessly flowing screen. There were unassigned assigned seats for everyone though, but tonight they broke it. Every member of the team swaddled you with love and protection not wanting to experience the terrible feeling of almost losing you again. So there you sat, in the middle of your family, everyone attempting to squeeze onto the largest couch in the world just wanting to be close to you. You didn’t mind at all, the experience had shaken you up and you needed comfort from whoever you could get it from.

One issue with movie nights though was no one could EVER agree on a movie.

“We could watch Star Wars!” Peter through his idea before it was immediately shot down by everyone else in the room.

“Can it, nerd. We watched that last week, I vote Die Hard,” Clint announced, trying to convince every one of his ideas.

“Hell no! I haven’t picked in forever, can I pick just this once?” Sam pleaded, giving the team his cute little puppy dog look.

“No. I pay for the movie, I get to chose,” Tony asserted. “And I’m choosing the Matrix.” You stifled a giggle before mumbling how he was a nerd to your boyfriend next to you. “I’m sorry, what was that Y/N?” your dad asked turning to look at the two cuddling teenagers.

“Nothing! I swear!” you spoke, voice laced with fake hurt. Tony glared at you before turning on the movie, the team settling into their normal viewing habits. There were those that actually watched the movie: Tony, Sam, Bruce, Wanda, and Natasha; those who were always confused: Thor and Steve; those who sometimes watched, sometimes talked: you and Peter, and those who fucked around, Clint and Bucky. You curled up on Peter’s chest, looking up at his face to admire all of his features. How could you have been so lucky to be in love with someone like him? You would have never guessed that he was thinking almost the same thing. The movie continued to play, and usually at this point more than half of the team would be passed out but tonight was different.

No one had slept for the past few days in fear of the constant stream of nightmares that would no for sure plague their sleep. No one wanted to see the image of your lifeless body again in their heads, so they avoided the one thing they needed the most. So when the movie ended, no one was asleep and a somber mood fell over the group, everyone too tired to speak or laugh anymore. Your head still rested on Peter’s chest as it rose and fell with the calming breathes he took. His hands entangled themselves in your hair, which he always did to help you either sleep or calm down, two things you needed to do at the moment.

Every time you closed your eyes, you could physically feel the freezing water and the overwhelming realization that you could die. So you just didn’t close your eyes. Tony was the first one to break the silence after the movie ended.

“I think it’s time to break out the videos,” he announced before asking Jarvis to pull up the folder full of the memories of your past. Full of the joys of the group. Full of memories that you wish you could experience again. Tony pressed the play button on a random one, the screen illuminated with a video of Clint chasing a seven-year-old you around the tower. Your eyes tore away from the screen to look at the man who starred along with you in the video. There was a bright smile on his face, instantly warming your heart. The man looked so happy to be rewatching one of his favorite memories with you. The video came to an end before the next one began, it was one with you and Bucky and Steve, trying to get you to say which one of the soldiers was your favorite but your stubborn self just shook your head, not wanting to admit it. You could feel Peter’s chest shake with laughter at the sight of his eight-year-old girlfriend being as sassy and stubborn as you were today.

You should be embarrassed, but you weren’t. Instead, you were happy, happy to be forgetting about the events of Wednesday.

The videos kept playing one after another for an hour or so, each team member laughing and smiling, you all just felt normal. You were so tired though, slowly drifting off in the embrace of Peter and you couldn’t stop it. Tony had noticed this and decided to play one last video before everyone had called it a night. Bucky perked up the second Tony pressed play.

“Hey! I took this one the other day!” Bucky announced, giddy to show everyone the cuteness of the video. Peter was surprised to find himself on the screen, a moment from just that Monday.

“Peter stop!” You giggled as your boyfriend slowly approached you, his wet body trying to get a grasp of yours.

“Why? Oh my goodness, do you not love me anymore?” Peter exclaimed, faking that he was hurt that you wouldn’t give you a hug.

“Ew no! You’re sweaty!” You sprinted away, trying to hide behind Thor. “Thor help me! He is going to get my sweaty!” Thor’s huge body effectively blocked yours, cutting off Peter’s view of you.

“Do not get Lady Y/N sweaty, I will have to use my hammer to destroy you,” Thor threatened, motioning to the hammer that lay on the kitchen counter next to a smiling Bucky, his phone drawn and capturing the entire event.

“Come on Y/N! I just want to express my admiration for my lovely girlfriend!” Peter yelled out to you.

“Nope! Thor is going to protect me, right Thor?”

“Of course, Lady Y/N, I would do anything to protect you!” You laughed proving to Peter that he couldn’t get to you.

“Fine! I’m going to go shower.” Peter sounded defeated as you raised your hand in triumph.

“Thank you, Thor!” You squealed, turning your back to open the fridge when suddenly, you were attacked. You screamed as your sweaty boyfriend pulled you into his arms, his sweaty skin touching your clean skin. “Peter! You asshole!” you yelled, struggling to get away from his hot body.

“Tell me you love me and I will let you go,” he demanded.

“Never!”

“Fine then we are just going to stay like this forever I guess,” he said making an attempt to shrug.

“Fine, love you.”

“Hm. I don’t believe you.” You rolled your eyes at his childish behavior.

“Peter Parker, I love you to the moon and back.” You weren’t lying.

“How many times?”

“As far as numbers can go.”

The whole team turned to face the young couple, radiating smiles plastered on their faces. You were now fast asleep as Peter stroked your hair, love evident in his eyes.

“I swear I am going to marry you one day Y/N,” he stated, melting the hearts of everyone in the room.

Peter Parker would never break his promise.

Thank god for home movies.


	2. human.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my lovely friends!! hope you are having a lovely day!! this was originally published on my tumblr @starksmile !! thanks for giving it a read and tell me how you liked it!!

originally published: 4-27-18

You couldn’t tell if the broken scream had either been yours or Peter’s.

It was supposed to be a simple mission, infiltrate the secret hideout of a mutant villain and kill him. In fact, you had only been informed of the mission early that morning.

Your day had started off as normal as ever, waking up to Peter’s warm body pressed up against your back. His arm protectively gripping your body, even in his sleep the kid was protective.

Peter Parker was by far the cutest thing you had ever seen in your life.

You rolled around to face him, a giggle escaping your lips at the sight of Peter’s sleeping face. His mouth was slightly ajar, a bit of drool hanging from his parted lips. He looked peaceful and adorable and all you wanted to do was just snuggle deeper into his chest, letting all the problems of the world fade away so all you had to worry about was how you were going to make a cup of tea from the cavern of your shared bed.

But that wasn’t the way the world worked.

Before you could even attempt at doing so, Steve burst into your room with no warning, scaring the hell out of you. Your movements jerked the boy next to you from his peaceful sleep, a groan signaling to you and Steve that he was now awake.

“Wheels up in thirty minutes, we need to go.” You were utterly confused, where were you going?

“Wait, what?” You questioned, now sitting up in bed while simultaneously rubbing the sleep out of your eyes to clear your blurred vision.

“Your dad finally figured out where Ghastly Sparrow is hiding out and-” Steve was cut off by a deep morning voice.

“Mr. Stark wants us to go?” Peter questioned, now wide awake at the prospect of actually being a vital aspect of the team.

“Yeah,” Steve sighed. He wasn’t exactly keen on letting you two come, but Tony had instated that they needed all hands on deck even if that meant that he was to bring his daughter and her boyfriend, the two youngest members of the team, into combat. The older man had to constantly remind himself that the two of you were ready for this, that you had been training for years, he attempted to push past the weary feeling in his stomach. “Something about needing all hands on deck,” Steve continued as he watched the two of you scramble to get up and get to where their suits were kept.

“Thanks, Steve!” You yelled while throwing open your closet door to reveal the practically untouched suit. A wide smile consumed your face.

You were finally about to do something and it felt amazing.

You wished that it could have stayed that way, but things never worked out in your favor. After the whole entire team had loaded into the Quinjet and Clint piloted the machine to the New York City skyscraper where the villain was hiding, did the panic starts to set in.

Something just felt, off. You couldn’t explain the feeling, but you couldn’t just ignore it.

“Y/N?” Your dad called out from the other side of the jet as your panicked eyes met his. “You okay, princess?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little anxious, you know? The first mission in a while-” You felt yourself start to ramble but you couldn’t help it, you tended to just word vomit when you were feeling the slightest bit off.

“She’s rambling,” Natasha stated, interrupting you. You glared at her from your seat next to Peter. You hadn’t even noticed Peter’s hand interlaced with your own, as he caressed his thumb against your slightly shaky hand.

“It’s going to be fine, Y/N,” Peter whispered, his body reaching out to offer you some sort of comfort. You gladly accepted the offer and leaned your tenser body into his softer, his touch instantly sending sedatives through your blood. You could physically feel your body start to relax- your heart rate slowed, your breathing settle, but you still couldn’t shake away the feeling. You gave Peter a smile, letting him know that you were somewhat calmer.

Your dad had begun to order everyone around, filling them in on their line of attack but you weren’t paying attention. You were trying to decode the feeling, attempting to pry it open and examine it from the inside but you were having no luck with it. You were helpless.

“And remember, don’t fall off the roof,” Tony laughed.

Poor choice of words.

In a record time, Clint dropped the group off at the roof of the building. Steve lead the group down the stairs and into the building, Bucky taking up the rear. It was silent as all of you snapped into their stealth modes. Your eyes scanned around you, listening for the slightest sound of movement, your gun drawn and ready to shoot.

“There!” Peter screamed, warning the group of the approaching figures. You aimed your gun to where Peter had motioned and sure enough, three mutant fly creatures appeared from the darkness of the corner. You shot without being even commanded to, much to the group’s dismay. You had never been big on guns and shooting, but you would do it only if you were commanded to do so.

But you hadn’t been commanded. Sam had opened his mouth to make a snarky comment, but quickly closed it when he had realized that there were more creatures heading your way.

The battle persisted, stranged cries from the creatures were all to be heard as each and every one of them getting obliterated.

You were about to shoot one of the creatures sauntering over to you when Wanda’s voice rang out.

“Sparrow is headed towards the roof!” You quickly shot the thing down before sprinting up to the roof, Peter, Bucky, Tony and Natasha in tow. You were greeted with the sight of Ghastly Sparrow sprinting to the edge of the roof, about ready to jump off and escape but that wasn’t about to fucking happen. You used all your strength to move your legs as fast as humanly possible and tackled the mutant to the ground.

Sure he was bigger and stronger than you, but if you could just get him down for even a few moments, one of the members of your team could come over and kill him. So that’s what you did, you used all your body mass to slam him into the ground, getting on top of him and shoving him into the hard pavement of the ground. He landed with a thud as you struggled to keep him down, calling out for your dad to assist you.

“Y/N!” You heard someone scream as the mutant regained control of the situation, his grubby hands grabbing a hold of your hair and slamming your head into the ground.

Well damn, that fucking hurt.

You weren’t quite sure what was happening around you, all you seemed to be able to concentrate on was the pain in your head as your vision blurred around the edges. You could make out the villain going in to slam your head down again as you braced yourself for the pain, but it never came as the mass was shoved off of you by a blur of red.

Peter?

You slowly sat up, steadying your balance with the palms of your hands and in a second, your dad was by your side.

“Y/N? Can you get up for me princess? Come on focus on me?” He sounded distant and frightened, something you had never really heard in your life before. Tony Stark was never frightened by anything, which was something you had always admired growing up.

“Peter?” Your voice slurred as you moved your head to the sounds of fighting next to you. The mutant was attacking the spider and you knew Peter couldn’t hold off the man by himself for too long. You shakily stood up, ignoring the protests from your father as Bucky sprinted over to help Peter with the mutant when you let off a short sigh of relief.

Peter was going to be okay.

Bucky shot at the mutant, but it didn’t seem to phase it. Its attention was solely focused on destroying Peter, and he was getting close to his goal. Bucky then gave up on the idea of shooting the thing and slammed into it so it released Peter.

You watched as it pushed Bucky to the ground. You watched as it took his gun. You watched Bucky’s face flinch up, preparing himself for the gunshot. You watched Peter’s body shove into the body in a feeble attempt at saving Bucky’s life. You watched as the mutant lost his balance, his feet taking him to the edge of the building. You watched him grab Peter in an attempt to stable himself. You watched as the mutant fell off the edge of the skyscraper. You watched as he fell to his death. You watched him take Peter with him.

There was nothing you could do as you watched your father jump off the edge to try and catch Peter with his suit. Someone let out a broken scream, but you weren’t sure if it was Peter or you.

This wasn’t happening.

Dad was going to catch Peter, it was going to be okay.

It was going to be okay.

It was going to be okay.

It was going to be okay.

Bucky was by your side in a moment, steering your frozen body away from the edge of the building. You hadn’t even noticed that you were leaning over the edge, searching for the sight of Iron Man with Spider-Man in his arms jetting back up to the top. Peter would climb out of his arms and pull you in for a hug and everything was going to be okay.

But you remembered the feeling you had since the mission started, and you lost it. You fell to the ground into a sobbing heap as Bucky screamed that you needed to get back up and get to the ground floor. But you couldn’t do anything.

It was too loud.

And there was too much happening.

And you couldn’t get up.

With a sigh, Bucky scooped back up your shaking body into his arms and sprinted down the stairs and back up to the building where the other’s were gathered, finishing off the rest of the creatures.

You could faintly make out the sound of voices arguing about what to do.

But you only had one priority, to find Peter.

“Peter,” you yelled, startling Bucky. He pulled you closer in his arms, repeating that he was going to get you downstairs so you could be reunited with the one you needed the most in your life. You could feel Bucky pass you into the arms of Sam, demanding that he get you down to the ground.

“Hey Y/N, can you focus on me?” You couldn’t. You needed Peter. “It is going to be okay, I just need you to open your eyes.” You pried your eyes open just a little, as you realized you were back on the roof, where just moments ago you might have witnessed the love of your life fall to his death. Your stomach dropped as the Falcon’s wings expanded as he leaped off the edge of the building, you still in his arms.

Wind soared through your hair, as you gripped on harder to the body that held you. You would have been panicking if you weren’t so out of it. In a matter of seconds, you felt everything halt to a stop.

Sam gasped.

Tony was crying.

Peter was silent.

Why was Peter silent?

Sam shielded you into his chest as you fought against his grip, needing to see that Peter was okay so you could relax and maybe even get rid of the feeling. But Sam wouldn’t let you go. Why wouldn’t he let you go? You just wanted to see Peter.

“Don’t let her see,” Your dad’s broken voice demanded as you continued to fight against the stronger man’s grip.

“Oh my god,” Sam choked. You didn’t give as your foot made contact with Sam’s dick, he dropped you to the floor with a groan, making your head shot up with pain. Your eyes squeezed shut, trying to get control of your pain again. You got up on all fours and opened your eyes.

You wish you had just listened.

You wished you had never opened your eyes.

Because the second you did, it all became too real.

The image of Peter Parker’s corpse would forever be burned into your head.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No, this wasn’t happening.

Peter wasn’t dead.

This was a joke.

A cruel sick joke.

Peter was going to pop up with his phone recording saying that he pranked you and that he was going to send this to everyone and they would all tease you to no end for actually believing that he died.

You were too busy being caught up in your own thoughts to notice that the rest of the team had reached the ground now. Their faces twisted in pain and sadness as they moved their eyes from the teenager’s body to you. You just sat there, staring at Peter’s body your own going completely still. You didn’t move. You didn’t cry. You made no effort to pull Peter’s body to yours and cry out for him to come back. You just sat there, looking at him.

Steve was the first one to move, to lay a hand on your shoulder. To bring you to his chest to shield you from the view of your dead boyfriend so one of the other member’s could grab his body and load it back on to the quinjet and cover it so they could get back to the compound and deal with it there. But the second Steve touched you, you lost it. You kicked and screamed and pulled Peter’s body into your hands and begged him to wake up.

You couldn’t live without him.

You loved him.

Holy shit.

You didn’t tell him you loved him before he died.

The last thing he would ever hear you saying wouldn’t be that you loved him.

“Peter, oh my god I am so sorry- I am so sorry Peter. I-I l-love you so much Peter, I am s-sorry,” You sobbed as the team’s hearts continued to break at the sight of you breaking down holding Peter’s body. Tony just stood there to the side, the guilt slowly starting to creep in. If only he hadn’t made the two of you come, Peter would still be alive and you wouldn’t be traumatized like you were now. He watched as Steve tried to pull you away and Bucky try to grab Peter from you, but you screamed and fought in protest. You screamed about how you were sorry. You screamed about how you loved him. You screamed in anger and in fright. You screamed that you could have done something.

Because all Stark’s had some insane guilt complex. 

“Y/N, we need to clear out,” Steve tried to plead, his eyes trying to focus on you instead of the dead teenager in your arms.

“No! I-I can’t-I can’t l-leave him- it’s my fault, my fault-my fault,” You hiccuped. Steve looked at the others for some form of help.

“We are going to bring him with us, okay?” You looked up to meet Steve’s face. You looked broken. Steve couldn’t hold back anymore as he burst into tears, ripping you from Peter and pulling you in for a hug. You tried to protest, you needed Peter back in your arms but Steve wouldn’t let you.

So there you sat.

Two heroes sobbing into each other’s arms in the streets of New York City.

One by one, heroes joined into the giant hug, allowing themselves to be human.

Allowing themselves to feel something.

Allowing themselves to mourn the death of one of their own.

Allowing themselves to be vulnerable for a few minutes.

Allowing themselves to be human, because deep down all of them were human no matter if they were a super-soldier or a mutant. They were all human.

Tony scooped up the body, not allowing himself to look at all the pain he had caused his daughter and his team.

“If you died, I feel like that’s on me.”

His own words came back to him.

It was on him.

And there was nothing he could do to stop the guilt.

The ride back to the compound was silent.

No one spoke after the hug had ended, not wanting to confront that they had all just seen each other break. All of them found their own spot on the Quinjet for their short journey home. You sat next to Peter’s body, brushing his hair out of his face and playing with hand.

He looked like he was sleeping, he looked peaceful.

But you knew he wasn’t sleeping, his pale, rigid body gave it away. And the coldness of his body.

You couldn’t cry anymore, so you sat there in silence. Wishing that you could have done something.

You could have done something.

You could have done something.

You could have done something.

You could have done something.

It was your fault.

You were responsible for his death.

You should have been the one killed.

It should have been you.

A month had passed since his death and the guilt had never left. The team expected you to be able to pick yourself back up because that was what Peter would have wanted. He would want you to know that it wasn’t your fault, that he died protecting you and he would do it again and again and again if he had to. But you couldn’t shake off the feeling that it was your fault. So you pushed away everyone who cared because you would end up killing them too. First your mom, now Peter. Who would be next? Steve? Wanda? Natasha? Bruce? Your dad? You couldn’t handle the thought of any of them dying, so you shoved them a far away as possible, which killed them all inside.

You had stopped talking after Peter’s funeral. You had dressed in a black dress that Peter had loved and headed to the graveyard, where the service was being held. It had been three days out of Peter’s death and you had been hiding out in your room, not sleeping but just staring out the window. You dreamt about what your life could have been.

What your proposal could have been like.

What your wedding could have been like.

His reaction to finding out you’re pregnant.

What you would name your kids.

What they would have looked like.

If you would have been that old cutesy couple, that were still in love even after all of these years.

But you and Peter would never get to experience that.

Because he was dead.

And it was your fault.

You stood out from the group of weeping teenagers and adults for you weren’t crying. People would come up to you, expressing their deepest condolences, but it was like your mind was somewhere else. You didn’t speak a word the whole entire funeral, it just didn’t feel real. You held May as she cried out for her nephew. The only family she had left and you killed him.

You were a monster.

“I am so sorry, May.” Those were the last words you spoke before running off, not wanting to see Peter’s body be lowered into the ground. Tony had started to run off behind you but Natasha stopped him.

“She needs to be alone right now.” Natasha shot him a sad smile as tears stung at his eyes before all of his pent-up emotions came crashing down all at once. He broke down in a mess of cries and Nastaha pulled him close. The feeling of someone else comforting him was such a foreign feeling. Normally he would protest the action, but he needed it. He needed someone to tell him that it wasn’t his fault and that he was going to be okay and Peter wouldn’t be mad at him and that his daughter didn’t hate him and that she was going to be okay.

“It’s going to be okay, Tony,” May spoke, tears streaming down her own cheeks. The sight of May made the older man sob, even more, pulling the women who raised Peter close. The two melted into the embrace letting grief overcome them.

You hadn’t let out a peep since that the day, even as hard as the team tried at first. You had been to countless mandated therapy sessions after the incident, but you would just stare straight ahead not even comprehending the words spoken by the therapist.

The team worried you, some electing to keep their distances, but some babying you. Steve and a few others were by your side almost twenty-four seven, making sure you were eating and sleeping and not doing anything to harm yourself. But others, like Tony, gave you space not interacting with you almost at all. All Tony wanted to do was hug you and hold you close, but something held him back. An invisible wall sprung up between the two of you that fateful day, your once strong relationship suddenly strained.

You wanted Peter back.

That’s all that consumed you, you didn’t deserve to be alive. You were the reason Peter wasn’t here, it was your fault.

There had been moments where you held a bottle of pills in your hands, thinking about just ending it all. It would be over within the hour, all the pain and sadness sound just melt away as you silently overdosed on the pills. The thought of fading away into nothingness almost made you smile, it was an escape from the pain. But something held you back from doing so, you liked to think that it was Peter. That he was still being protective even if he was dead. You liked to think that he was looking down on you from where ever he was. It brought you a small amount of comfort to imagine that, but not enough to bring you out of your down word spiral.

A month with a tear shed was hard. There were other moments where all you wanted to do was scream and just sob and let the others comfort you, but you weren’t worthy. You didn’t deserve the comfort of anyone. You were destined to suffer alone, it was your punishment for killing Peter.

One month and two days after the day you killed Peter, the team had decided that it was time to clean out the young teenager’s room as he wouldn’t be needing it anymore. Steve had dragged you out of your room even though you frowned and shook your head, but he claimed that you needed to decide what stuff to keep and what stuff to donate. Aunt May had also requested that you be there, as she wanted to see how you were doing after the funeral but you didn’t think you could quite face her again. Steve practically dragged you out of your room as you pounded at his chest with a chest. You were suddenly surrounded by the large group, some of which you hadn’t seen for almost a month including your father.

The sight of you almost sent Tony in tears, you were skinnier than when he last saw you, your eyes were glazed over in something that he couldn’t quite make out and your hair had lost its shine. You were a shell of what you once were, which broke the already broken man. The group said their hellos, all trying to put on a smile for yours and May’s sake.

Unlike Tony, May had immediately started to cry at the sight of you and pulled you in for a hug, which you didn’t even return. You just kind of looked at her, unsure of what to say or do.

“Okay, so everyone just take a corner of the room and make two piles of what to save and what to donate. We can go through the piles as a group after we are done,” Steve spoke with a kind of softness that you would speak to a child with. You decided to take the responsibility of Peter’s nightstand table. You sat down on his bed, shaky hands opening the drawer to reveal a mess of things. The first thing you had picked up was a stack of pictures. Pictures of Aunt May and him. Pictures of his friends. Pictures of you and him. One stood out though, it was you and Peter cuddled up on the couch, both laughing about something. You remembered Bucky had taken the picture and teased you both about it for weeks after, instituting that you two were like cute little puppies. Peter would puff up his chest and try and convince that he was not a puppy and you would just pout. You almost smiled at the memory, but you didn’t. The next thing you had picked up was an unused condom. You felt yourself blush a little, at the memories of some of the things you and Peter had done. Your hands next grabbed at a book but before you could flip it over to see what it was about, the sound of Peter’s voice filled the air.

“You are so cute!” You instantly perked up at the sound, eyes scanning the room for what was making that noise. It was a video playing on his computer, you were also in it.

“I am not! You are cuter!” You watched yourself boop Peter on the nose, as Bucky frantically tried to get the video to stop playing.

“Y/N,” You held up a hand to Bruce, who was trying to get you to look away from the video, in fear it would cause more damage.

“You can’t argue with me cutie,” Peter laughed as you huffed out your chest, trying to seem more menacing.

“Shut up.”

“You know I love you right?” Peter questioned, pulling you closer to him. You felt a pang in your chest the familiar feelings of a breakdown setting in.

“I don’t,” You said with a pout as he smiled. 

“I love you Y/N Stark, even if your dad is really scary.”

“I love you too, Peter Parker.” You pulled him in for a delicate kiss.

“I swear I am going to marry you one day.”

With that, you broke.

You fell to the floor into a pile of sobs and screams, crying out for Peter. Tony was the first one to reach you, pulling you into his chest, slowly rocking you back and forth. You cried out for your daddy to help you, as he just shushed you running his fingers through your hair.

“I am so sorry I killed him, daddy,” you sobbed, breaking your silence.

“’s not your fault,” he mumbled against your head. The group let the two have their moment before everyone joined the hug.

Once again, the group broke down into humans once again, letting their emotions flow free. Leaning on the others for support but also offering their support. There the group stayed, grieving for their loss together.

Peter Parker was a special person.

And even though he was gone, he would live in your hearts forever.

Peter Parker didn’t blame his death on you, and you were beginning to see that. You were finally starting to accept the help you so desperately needed, and you had Peter to thank for that. You felt his presence in the room and for once, you realized you weren’t alone in the world.

Thank god for Peter Parker.


	3. songs for someone who doesn't love me back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my lovely friends!! this is one of the most CLICHE things i have written so please bear with me!! but i hope you enjoy!! once again, these are originally found published on my tumblr @starksmile !! please tell me how you liked it or if you didn't and feel free to leave a request!! <3

originally published: 4-21-18

You were so blinded by love at first that you hadn’t realized the pure torture it was to be in love with Peter Parker.

It wasn’t just a simple schoolgirl crush where you thought about him when you saw him at school and daydreamed about his soft lips upon your own. It was a deep desire to spend the rest of your life with him, to tell him all your secrets and for him to do the same. You craved a sense of love and affection from the boy, but in return, you received a sense of friendship from him.

Peter Parker was dating Liz Allan.

Each waking day was full of a sense of agony and pain, your heart couldn’t handle seeing someone who wasn’t you kissing him. But he was happy and he loved her, there was nothing you could do. You were hopeless, all you could do was just sit back and watch it happen. You could attempt to ignore it, but it never worked as Peter was one of your closest friends and you couldn’t just walk away from that. So you tried your hardest to keep your feelings at bay, to not let how you felt effect your social life.

Your feelings could kill you, but you wouldn’t let it kill your friend’s relationship.

And that’s exactly what they did, slowly killed you on the inside.

It was a form of emotional torture, what you wanted was right in front of you, but you couldn’t have it. You didn’t know how long you were going to be able to last before you finally broke.

“Y/N?” Your eyes snapped up from the sheet in front of you, plucking a stray earbud from your ear. “Are you coming?” Ned asked, motioning to Liz and Peter who were already deep in a conversation. You let out a breath, weighing the pros and cons of going in your mind.

On one hand, you would get to go see a movie with your friends, but on the other hand, you would have to put up with Liz and Peter.

“Oh, I-I think my dad actually wanted me home,” you let out a nervous laugh hoping Ned didn’t know the truth. Deep down you knew he did, but some part of you wanted to think that no one had any idea and you were doing a fantastic job of covering it up. Ned just hummed in response, his eyes rolling at your clearly fake excuse.

“He is going to find out eventually,” Ned sighed, lying a steady hand on your hunched shoulders. Your anxious eyes met his softer ones.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” You squeaked, eliciting a slight head shake from Ned.

“I know everything, Y/N. You know I don’t want you to get hurt, but,” Ned trailed off, regretting that he had even started the sentence.

“What?” You pressed on, now eager to hear what he had to say.

“They are getting pretty serious Y/N, maybe you should just forget about him.” You glanced over to the happy couple, Peter’s arm draped around her neck, a happy little grin plastered on his face. He whispered something in her ear, scoring a giggle from her and a deep laugh from him. His eyes were full of such a love, a kind of love he never looked at you with. They looked happy, and you were not about to ruin it.

“You know I can’t,” you frowned, now looking back to close friend. “But I am really trying.”

“You deserve better,” he smiled, making an attempt at cheering you up. In return you gave him a sad smile, thanking him for his attempt. You knew it wasn’t true. You didn’t deserve anyone better. Hell, you didn’t even think you deserved Peter Parker.

But you sure wish you did.

You got up from your spot in the library, Ned in tow.

“Hey guys, my uh- my dad actually wanted me home for some bonding thing,” you trampled, hoping they believed your obvious lie as you fiddled with your fingers not wanting to meet their eyes.

“That’s okay! I wouldn’t want to go against Tony Stark’s orders, there is always next time!” Liz exclaimed making you bite your tongue.

As much as you wanted to hate Liz, you couldn’t bring yourself to. She had done nothing wrong and she was just such a wonderful person who didn’t deserve any misdirected hate from you. You knew the person you should be hating was yourself, not Liz.

“Yeah,” you breathed, looking up to meet Liz’s happy eyes. “Thanks for inviting me, though. I hope you all have fun!” You swore you saw Peter’s face fall a little.

“Thanks, Y/N. Now I get to third wheel.” You let out a genuine laugh at Ned’s comment, now he got to feel how you had been feeling for the last few months.

“Sorry, dude! I better get going though, I can’t miss the train again. Bye guys!”

You started to walk away, your eyes trained on the doors in front of you, wanting to get back to your home as fast as you could. Knuckles turned white as you gripped your backpack with all your strength, twenty more minutes then you could fall apart.

“Y/N!” Fuck.

“Hey,” you turned around, plastering a fake smile on your face to greet Peter.

“Are you okay?” His eyes scanned you over for any sign of distress. You had been distant lately and he hated it, he missed his friend.

“Yeah,” you croaked, confusion evident in your voice. Did he know?

“You would do anything to avoid the tower, where is the rebellious Y/N that I know?” He poked.

“I don’t know,” you laughed, hoping that would send Peter off your trail. “I have to go, bye.”

“Hey,” he pulled you in for a hug, making your heart flutter. The feeling didn’t last as you melted into his body, your heart becoming submerged in hurt and pain. This is what it felt like to have Peter care.

Something you wouldn’t get to experience.

“You know you can always talk to me, okay? I just want you to be okay, Y/N,” he mumbled into your hair, holding you as tight as humanly possible, to show you he cared.

“Thank you, Peter; but seriously, everything is fine. Don’t you worry your pretty little head.” Peter frowned but nodded his head. He knew something was up but he didn’t want to press any further in fear that he would push you even further away.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” You nodded in response, before pushing the steel doors open, cold New York City air nipping at your exposed arms instantly making you curl further into yourself for warmth.

Making you feel smaller than you already felt.

Your feet dragged against the concrete sidewalks, as you made your way home. You couldn’t concentrate on anything, your mind somewhere else. You couldn’t even concentrate on your favorite podcast, something that had never failed to cheer you up until now. A part of your heart was missing. Gone. Vanished from sight. Leaving you to feel empty and pathetic on the inside. You didn’t deserve shit, here you were thinking that if just Liz and Peter broke up that you maybe had a shot with him.

You and Peter would never be able to become a thing.

You hadn’t even noticed that you had stumbled into the tower and into the elevator, shooting you up to your room.

“Hey! I thought you were going to the movies?” Your father shouted from the other room, clearly not expecting you to be here. You shrugged the backpack off your shoulders giving you a few minutes to collect yourself before walking into the common space.

“We decided against it,” you lied, waving to your father and Pepper at the dining room table before grabbing an orange, giving your fingers an excuse to fiddle.

“You were so excited though! What happened Y/N/N?” Pepper soothing voice tried to decode the situation but you didn’t want to let her know.

“I just wasn’t feeling it tonight,” you sighed. “What are your plans for tonight?”

Pepper elbowed him in the ribs, motioning with her head that he should intervene.

“We were just going to watch a movie and discuss our plans to take over the world, you’re more than welcome to join,” he snorted.

“I’m okay, who is home though?” You didn’t want to be alone right now, in fear of what would happen if you were alone with your thoughts.

“Bucky, Steve, maybe Natasha? Not sure,” Tony responded, clearly more interested in Pepper at the moment. And with that, you were off without a word. Tony tried to pull Pepper closer to him, but she refused.

“Somethings up with her.” She bit her lip, brainstorming a list of things that could be wrong.

“She is fine,” Tony whined, reaching his arms out for Pepper like a child.

“Tony, I am not joking, has she said anything recently?” Tony sighed wracking his brain for anything of concern that you had recently said.

“No, I don’t think so.” Pepper frowned, not satisfied with his response.

“Why are you Stark’s so good at hiding things?” She mumbled, finally giving into Tony’s demands, earning a crude laugh from him.

“It’s built in our genes.”

Your socked feet barely hit the ground as you ran to where you would most likely find Bucky and Steve, the gym.

You didn’t want to be alone.

But you were so alone at the exact same time.

“Who’s there?” Steve yelled out, grabbing a knife from the table bracing himself to fight. Oh shit, you had been too loud.

Fuck up.

“Sorry, it’s Y/N.” You raised your hands, stepping out into the artificial light.

“I thought you were going to the movies with your friends?” Bucky appeared next to Steve as he slowly lowered his knife, clearly still on edge.

“Sorry, I-I thought you were somebody else,” Steve sputtered, Bucky resting his hand on the man’s shoulder to calm him down.

“It’s fine.” Your brows furrowed looking at Steve.

Great now you freaked out Steve.

Could you do anything right?

“Are you okay?” Bucky asked, creeping closer to your rigid body.

“Yeah, no totally fine! I just wanted to say hi to you both,” you stammered, arms curling around yourself to make you even smaller.

“Why didn’t you go to the movie?” Steve asked, looming closer to you.

“I just didn’t want to, t-tired and all?”

“What’s wrong?” Bucky was now by your side, a look of concern etched in his features.

“Nothing!” You exclaimed.

“Is someone bothering you?” You shook your head in response. Eyes not wanting to meet the others.

“Is it your friends?” You hesitated for a slight fraction of a second before shaking your head once more.

“It’s one of her friends,” Bucky turned to Steve. “Can you go get big Stark down here?”

“No!” you yelped. “You don’t need to get him, I-I’m fine!” Your body started to go into panic, you needed to get out of there. They couldn’t know, they would tell him. If Peter knew then you could lose your friendship, you would lose the one thing that you needed most.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, my love. Can you just tell me what’s wrong?” Bucky asked as your eyes went from him to the door.

No one moved.

Until your legs started to move, in a hurry to get out of there as fast as humanly possible. But you were no match for a super soldier. You were tackled to the ground by Bucky, his hands motioning for Steve to go and get Tony.

“Did you really think you could leave?” He let out a small laugh, before pulling himself off of you and pulling your body into his arms on the floor.

You couldn’t take it anymore.

All the pent-up emotions broke free and you started to cry, something Bucky had never seen happen before.

“Calm down, it’s all going to be okay. I promise I won’t let anything bad happen, okay?” Bucky cooed, rocking your crying body back and forth.

“I-I can’t help it!” You managed to get out between your strangled cries.

“You can’t help what, my love?” Bucky pushed, needing to know what happened and who he would have to kill.

“H-He is with Liz!”

“Who?” Bucky arched his brow in confusion.

“Peter!” It clicked.

You liked Peter Parker.

“I love Peter but he doesn’t love me back!” You said it. You couldn’t believe that you had said it aloud. You confessed your deepest secret just as your father tumbled into the room, Pepper and Steve also.

“Told you something was up,” Pepper muttered to a shocked Tony before walking over and kneeling in front of you and Bucky.

“Hey Y/N, it’s going to be okay, I swear,” Pepper cooed, attempting to calm you down. She knew what it was like to like someone who didn’t like her back. She knew he excruciating pain and torture it was to deal with that. But she also knew that the pain would soon stop, and things would be okay in the end, even though they seemed crazy in the moment.

“N-No it’s not!” you hiccuped. “He is in love with Liz! H-He doesn’t even like me!” You could practically hear everyone in the room’s heart’s breaking at the sight of someone that they loved, breaking down.

“I am going to fucking murder him,” Tony murmured, turning his back at the sight of his crying child, but Steve stopped him.

“No you’re not, you are going to be there for your daughter, that’s what you are going to do,” Steve reprimanded him.

“Have you told him how you feel?” Pepper asked your shaking body. Bucky’s hand rubbed up and down your back, not liking to see you in pain over some boy.

No boy would ever be worthy enough to deserve you.

“N-No! I-I can’t do that! I-I mean it would r-ruin our friendship and ruin their relationship and he looks so happy- god he looks so happy with her,” you continued, the weight of the whole entire situation finally coming down on you.

“Sweetie, you need to tell him how you feel, you can’t keep things like him. You are ruining things for yourself.” You looked up your teary eyes meeting her concerned ones.

“He would hate me,” you whispered, your voice pained.

“He wouldn’t,” Tony joined in, kneeling next to Pepper.

“He would, b-besides what would he could he do? He can’t just break up with Liz.”

“I know, I know,” Pepper ran her a hand through her hair, not sure what to do but Tony stepped forward, like a god ascending from the heavens because what you needed right now was your father.

“Hey- Fuck I am not- I am not really good at these things, you should know Y/N,” you let out a small giggle. “When you were born I wasn’t really sure what to do. I mean you were just so small and innocent and vulnerable and I just wasn’t sure what to feel or what to do. I was scared. I was terrified of the unknown, but the second I held you in my arms for the first time, I knew everything. I knew that I had to protect you and most importantly I knew that you deserved nothing short of the world. You deserve more than this kiddo. You don’t deserve to love someone who doesn’t love you back. You don’t deserve to see him with someone else. I’m not saying that you should just go and break the relationship he already has, I am saying that you need to find your self-worth. You need to realize that he might not love you like that, he might only love you like a friend and that is okay. But you need to tell him how you feel. You’re a Stark and bottling things up doesn’t ever go well for us. You don’t deserve to be hung up on some boy, kid. You deserve the whole entire fucking world, don’t you ever forget that.”

Silence.

Then a laugh and a slow applause.

“To think, that I said that Tony Stark doesn’t have a heart,” Bucky laughed, his chest shaking, therefore, his chest shaking you.

You deserve the world.

You deserve the whole entire fucking world.

You didn’t deserve to be hung up on a boy.

You didn’t deserve to love someone who loved someone else.

You deserved more.

After you calmed down and received an endless amount of hugs from the four grown adults, you retreated back to your room to where your cell phone charger was.

You plugged it in and the screen lit up, your hands danced across the screen as you dialed the number you knew by heart.

“Hello?”

“Peter? Can we talk?


	4. just a kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my lovely friends!! as always, these are cross-posted from my tumblr so check me out @starksmile if you would like!! please tell me how you liked it or if you didn't!! thanks for reading!! <3

originally posted: 5-6-18

You learned a lot on the raft.

You learned of your teammate’s lives, their strengths, weakness, and how they would respond to repeated beatings.

You learned your limits, just how much pain you could endure before you broke down.

You learned that not all promises were built on truth, that sometimes they were broke at the hands of the ones you loved.

You sat on your couch an abandoned movie playing in the background as you twiddled aimlessly with the knife in your hands, repeating the words that Clint has previously spoken.

“We need you, Y/N.”

All you ever wanted was to be wanted, to be needed, to feel like you had a purpose in your mundane life. Now you had the opportunity, but it just didn’t feel right. You couldn’t place the origin of the feeling, but it left you with uncertinity about teaming up with Captian America. You were too caught up in your own thoughts that you almost didn’t notice the buzzing of your phone next to you. Your eyebrows furrowed, confused at who would be calling you at the early hours of the morning but you answered, assuming it might just be Clint with more orders of the day to come.

“Y/N?” Peter breathed, his voice sounding slightly strained. Your lips twitched up into a smile at the sound of your best friend, maybe he could help you to pinpoint the issue.

“Peter-”

“We need to talk,” he paused before you could hear him take a shuttering breath. “And look I need you to be straight up with me, Y/N/N-”

“Peter, what’s wrong?” You questioned, picking yourself off the couch, the off feeling starting to intensify and consume your body.

“Did you just get recruited by Hawkeye?” His question took you off guard as you exhaled sharply.

A few seconds of silence passed, filled with the soft sounds of you both breathing over the phone.

“Y/N, please answer-”

“You’re fighting with Stark aren’t you?” You whispered, the whole situation slowly starting to make sense.

“Yeah-”

“Peter, do you even know what this is about?” You ran a hand through your messy hair, starting to pace around the room.

“Yes! Of course, Mr. Stark explained it to me yesterday,” he rambled, panic starting to rise inside of him.

You let out a crude laugh, “Of course he did.”

“You know it’s not too late to switch sides-”

“Who said I was even thinking of switching sides?” You cut him off.

“Listen, Mr. Stark said-”

“I don’t give a shit what he said! Cap’s right on this one, okay? You do understand that this isn’t a small playground fight Peter, peoples lives are at stake here-”

“More innocent people are going to die, without this Y/N!” Peter jeered, his voice starting to grow louder.

You bit your lip, shaking your head. “People like you and me would have to reveal our identities, did Mr. Stark tell you that?” The silence answered the question for you. “Which would put us in danger! Jesus Christ Peter, it would put everyone we have ever loved in danger! They could-”

“Enough!” Peter roared. “How could you be so selfish-”

You laughed again, cutting him off again. “Oh, I am the selfish one?”

“You know what, I’m done with this shit! If you are going to be so closed minded about what’s right, then that’s that! I hope you bring the fucking fight.”

Your eyes squeezed shut, the only person you actually gave a shit about was turning on you.

“Peter-”

“No, you don’t get to just ‘Peter’ me! We’re done with this shit.” You could practically see him running a hand through matted down curls, a look of pain etched into his features. “Just promise me Y/N that you won’t come running back when you realize that you fucked up.”

You wanted to tell him to come back.

You wanted to tell him that you still loved him even if he didn’t agree.

You wanted to tell him that you still cared.

You wanted to tell him everything you never got the chance to say.

But instead, you were greeted with a heavy silence pressing down on your chest and lungs making it hard to breathe and comprehend what just happened. Your mind raced at a million miles a minute, trying to process the fact that your best friend, the one who vowed to keep you safe, the one who would do anything to make you smile, basically told you to fuck off.

So you picked up your phone and called the number.

Ring.

Ring.

“Hello?” A sleepy voice answered.

“Clint? I’m in.”

You didn’t sleep at all leading up to Germany. Any time you would close your eyes the darkness would fill up with images of you fighting Peter.

Peter’s fist slamming into the side of your face.

Peter’s hand wrapping around your throat, the sweet flow of oxygen being cut off.

Peter’s mask being the last thing you see before being tossed into a sea of darkness and death.

The images burned your mind, creating rough, callously scars that became harder and harder to ignore.

You were nervous, but you put on a brave face. You were fighting for what you believe in, for what was right and nothing was going to stand in your way.

“Are you for real?” Steve asked, eying you up and down as you exited the car, all suited up and ready for action. You took your spot next to Clint with a frown etched on your face.

“What do you mean?” Clint asked, slinging an arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to his body. You gave the older man a weak smile, trying to convince him that you were okay.

“She is just a kid.”

You snorted, staring Steve Rogers straight in the eyes. “Stark is bringing a kid with him as well, you are going to need my help.”

“I think we can take down a kid by ourselves,” Scott laughed earning a cold glare from yourself.

“He is enhanced so I think you will need my help,” you sassed, Scott backing away slightly.

“Enhanced how?” Wanda asked, head cocked slightly to the side.

You bit your lip, “Like a spider.”

Sam started to laugh, all heads turning to him. “Wait you’re serious?”

Your eyes squeezed shut again as you focused on your breathing. “Yeah, super strength and he is able to shoot webs. Also, he has this weird sixth spider sense thing, so good luck trying to get your punches in.”

Steve stepped forward, confusion prominent in his eyes. “How do you know this?”

“Let’s just say Spider-Man and I go way back.” The sentence almost made you laugh, what had been your best friend just three days ago was now your enemy. The person you were supposed to fight. The person you were supposed to inflict pain and harm on. The person you had once promised to protect.

Everyone nodded in understandment, no one wanting to pry at the clearly sensitive topic.

Thus creating Team Captian America.

You watched as Steve talked to Tony but your heart dropped at what happened next. A red-suited figure flipping in from the sides, webbing up Steve. Your heart continued to tug as you watched him embarrass himself in front of one of his idols. A small giggle escaped your lips but you tried to cover it up as a cough even though no one was around you to hear.

Then you heard Cap’s signal and your feet carried you as fast as you could, appearing by his side within seconds.

Tony laughed, “Oh now you are going to pit these two against each other, nice one asshole.”

“Little too late for that,” you glared at Peter as the whites of his mask shrunk, which you assumed was his way of glaring back at you.

Scott suddenly grew to the size of a normal person, knocking Peter off his spot. You stifled another giggle but were suddenly knocked to the ground by the force of Natasha. The two of you engaged quickly in a fight, “I-I don’t want to-” you dogged another fist, “-hurt you!”

“Clearly. You’re pulling your punches Y/L/N,” she mumbled landing a punch on the side of your stomach. You gasped deciding it was time to reach for the knife in your belt. Your fingers danced upon the cool metal grip as you grasped it in your hands, nicking Natasha on the arm. She faulted for a split second, giving you enough time to flip her to the ground.

“I’m sorry, Nat,” you frowned, trying to ignore the way your heart was breaking.

“Keep fighting, милая.” Your legs carried you away, head looking around for where you were needed. You saw Clint and Wanda trying to escape the wrath of Tony Stark, so that’s where you went next. They knelt to the ground as you used your body to shield them from the flying debris.

“Thanks,” Clint mumbled, bow drawn and following Tony’s suited-up body.

“Wanda, I think you hurt Vision’s feelings.”

Wanda snarled her lip at the man, betrayal clear on her face. “You locked me in my room.”

You knawed on your lip, anxious about Tony’s raised arm. “Okay, first, that’s an exaggeration. Second, I did it to protect you.” His attention shifted to you.

“Now I get why the kid has been out of it these past few days.”

“Stay out of it,” you growled, gun still is drawn and ready to shoot at a moment’s notice.

“You do understand you are a wanted criminal kiddo,” Tony sighed, raising his arm down. “If you leave now, I could protect you from Ross.”

“No can do, Stark. I am not a coward.”

Tony laughed, somewhat admiring your spunk, “Never said you were kiddo.” He turned to where Clint was standing by your side. “Hey, Clint.”

“Hey Man.”

“Clearly retirement doesn’t suit you. You got tired of shooting golf?”

“Well, I played eighteen, shot eighteen,” he loosened his neck. “Just can’t seem to miss.”

With that, he shot three arrows, each and everyone missing Tony.

“First time for everything.”

Clint didn’t look fazed, “Made you look.”

Cars came crashing down as you darted off the scene, wanting to take a quick breather before the main action. Your break was cut short as you heard Steve yell for you. Legs carried you quickly as you rushed back onto the fighting ground, falling into pace with your teammates. Vision’s laser cut you off, trying to give a speech that literally no one cared about.

“What do we do now, Cap?” Your eyes locked with Peter’s masked ones.

“We fight.” With that you started to run directly at Peter ready to fight him, trying to push back the mental scars of what you saw in your dreams.

You noticed Peter hesitating, saying something to Stark before charging forward at you. Once he was in range, you pounced on him. All the anger and resentment building up towards him in the past few days now finally escaping. The force coming from your body knocked him to the ground, hard enough to hurt apparently as a little gasp left his lips.

That little noise hurt your heart.

You were quick to put your self on top of him, punching him in the face. You raised your fist to repeat the action, but he grabbed it and twisted your arm around. You yelped in pain as your body made contact with the concrete ground. Peter raised his fist as you braced yourself for the pain, but the blow never came. You opened one of your eyes to peek at what was happening, Peter had taken off his mask, his orbs bored into your own. There was something soft about them that calmed your anger down immediately. Instantly, you felt sorry. Sorry that you got angry. Sorry that you yelled. Sorry that you didn’t listen to his side of the story.

Sorry that you caused him pain.

“I am so sorry, Y/N,” he whispered, slipping his mask back over his head and webbing you to the floor. You gave him a sad smile, realizing that there was no point in putting up a fight. You had lost.

“Go,” you whispered, sending him a small smile. He gave a small thumbs up as you laid your head back on the ground, eyes staring up at the clear blue sky ahead of you.

You were somewhat at peace.

That was until Ross and co came, the sound of helicopters and planes overhead becoming too much to bear. You closed your eyes as people barked commands around you. Hands grabbed at your arms, assuming you were to put up a fight. They cut the webs off of you, freeing you and allowing you to fight, but you didn’t. You were too exhausted as they pulled you up to a standing position, the cold barrel of a gun pressing against your sweating forehead. You flinched away, buckets of anxiety pouring over you and soaking you from head to toe.

“Hey,” you heard Clint call out. “There is no need for that!” The guard next to you let out a loud laugh, shaking the air around you.

“She is a criminal.” Oh yeah. You forgot about that.

You were led onto a plane and strapped into a seat, the rest of the team filing in behind you, minus Bucky and Steve. The plane roared to life, shaking you and your seat. You counted in your head, trying to calm your nerves.

“Y/N?” You looked at Clint with wide eyes, reminding the team that you were truly just a child. “I’m sorry.”

You shook your head, not breaking eye contact. “You don’t need to apologize, I got myself into this mess.”

Clint’s brows furrowed, “I am the one-”

“No,” you interrupted, not wanting to hear his guilt. “You gave me a choice, Clint.” He nodded, focussing his eyes on anywhere but you. The rest of the trip was filled with an eerie silence, hoping that Steve was planning your escape already. As the plane descended, you held your breath not knowing what the future was going to hold. The door opened, revealing choppy waves.

Oh no.

You always hated the ocean.

“Wait! No, no! Please don’t! Come on! No!” You screamed, struggling against the restraints in your chair. Your eyes anxiously darted around the room, looking for an escape plan.

“Detain her!” Someone barked as you felt strong arms push you back, unfamiliar faces swarming around you, making you feel even more overwhelmed.

“No, please!” You pleaded as you were led to your feet, hands digging into your skin. The more you squirmed against them, the harder they pressed causing you to cry out in pain. A hand slapped the side of your face eliciting a fiery pain on your face, wide eyes searched for the culprit.

“Shut up!” He screamed, tightening his grip anymore which just led you to panic even more.

“Come on, she is just a kid!” You heard Sam scream, as tears blurred your vision. You refused to move your legs, insisting on staying sedentary. One of your hands escaped the grip as you elbowed the guard next to you with all your might.

“We need backup!” You could barely make out someone talking, but you felt distant and overwhelmed. More hands grabbed at you as someone screamed out, seconds later you realized that was you.

“Don’t struggle, Y/N! Just focus on my voice!” You heard Clint yell out to you, his voice grounding you a little. You blinked back the blurry tears as you were dragged out of the plane by a group of men dressed in the same uniform.

Ross walked over to your shaking figure, looking at you like you were subhuman.

“Sir, she is being difficult,” one of the men next to you stated, as you cried quietly.

“Miss Y/L/N, I recommend not struggling as it will just make things worse for yourself. There is no way of escaping this one,” he turned back to the guards. “Take her to her cell, but first strip her of these clothes and confiscate everything.”

You hiccuped, “Please no!” Ross smirked, waving goodbye as you were led to the floating death trap and thrown into a room with four men.

The next ten minutes were haunting as they stripped you of your clothes, being a little too touchy as they dressed you back up.

You lost it when they tried to touch the necklace that Peter had given to you many years ago.

“No! Y-You can’t- You can’t t-take that!” The guard smirked as he tore the necklace from your neck, breaking it into two. You collapsed into a sobbing heap on the floor, feeling disgusting and violated. One of the guards kicked you in the stomach, demanding that you stand back up. You didn’t listen, as all you could think about was the fact that you might never see Peter again.

They were going to kill you.

You felt arms pull you up as you attempted to struggle out of their tight grips, but you failed as they slipped a straight jacket on you, as if you were crazy. They proceed to put a collar on you like a dog.

You were powerless.

You were going to die here in the floating death trap.

You were going to die and Peter was going to think that you died hating him.

You didn’t hate him.

You were so stunned by your thoughts that you didn’t put up a fight as they led you to your cell, tossing you in and locking you in. Your eyes couldn’t focus anywhere but straight ahead of you, as your mouth fell slightly ajar. Other members of your team were led in, dressed in almost the same thing minus the straight jackets and collars except for Wanda.

Perks of being enhanced.

No one spoke until the last guard left the room.

“Is everyone okay?” Scott asked, picking himself off the floor.

Clint nodded, looking at the cells across from him. His eyes fell on your shaking figure. Your eyes were glazed over and he wasn’t even quite sure if you were there mentally. The guilt of the entire situation started to eat at him, you were just a kid. He shouldn’t have brought you into battle and it was his fault you were here. Your image morphed into the image of his own daughter being in the exact same position. He shook away the thought, his eyes full of concern for you, “Y/N.”

No response.

“Y/N?” He repeated, a little louder.

Your ears perked up at the sound of your name as you slowly turned towards him, your tear-filled eyes meeting his concerned ones.

“Are we going to die here?” You squeaked, as Clint’s jaw dropped.

“No! No fucking way, Steve will come and get us, don’t worry! We will protect you, do you hear me? You are not going to die!” Clint returned you as you rocked back and forth.

“I don’t want to die,” you repeated over and over again, breaking Clint’s heart.

“How do you know he is going to come for us?” Scott asked looking at Clint for an answer. Clint shot him a glance that screamed at him to shut up, motioning his head over to you.

“Stay strong kiddo. We won’t let them hurt you.”

They were wrong.

Within an hour, a group of guards came in screaming profanities at the five of you. No one reacted, as you all tried to zone them out.

“Your kind deserves to be eliminated, you freak.” You winced at the sentence. “Hey! I got a reaction out of this one!” He screamed, motioning for his friends to gather around. They unlocked your door as you tried to hide in the corner, silently praying to yourself that some of them had some sort of decency and would stop the cruel acts before they started.

They didn’t.

For the next three days, you were brutally beaten by groups of men, the haunting screams of you and your teammates echoing off the walls of the raft. After a while, you stopped putting up a fight, letting the guards use you as their rag doll. You hoped that one of them would just kick your head in, snapping your neck in the process so you could be put out of your misery.

Clint tried to reassure the group that soon Steve would arrive and help all everyone escape, but hope was starting to fade away as the hellish torture continued.

That was until Tony Stark appeared.

His eyes widened in horror at the state of his ex-teammates. He made his rounds to everyone’s cell doors taking in each member’s injuries and what kind of medical attention they needed.

“Oh kid,” Tony sighed when he arrived you at your door eyes scanning over your broken body. You made no indication that you even realized what he was saying. “What happened to her?” Tony demanded, looking over at Clint.

Clint closed his eyes, trying not to replay the horrors of the past few days in his head. “So much, Tony. So much.”

Tony turned back to you, “Do you know how much Peter has been worrying about you?” You perked up at the sound of the only person that has been on your mind’s name. Tony smiled as it was clear how much the two of you loved each other. “He won’t sleep, he blames himself you know? He is so sorry that he said all of that to you. He wanted me to tell you how much he loves you and how sorry he is.” Your eyes started to well up again, stray tears running down your bruised face.

“T-Tell him,” you spoke, your voice shakey and worn down. “That I-I-I love him t-too.” You tried to smile, but it hurt to move.

“You will see him again soon, kid. Real soon,” Tony smiled, winking in your direction. And with that, he was gone, reassuring the group that they will be rescued from their own personal hell real soon.

Another seven hours passed filled with insults and punches until the outline of Steve Rogers appeared, Natasha and Peter Parker by his side.

Peter could not stop twiddling his thumbs on the way over, anxiety coursing through his veins at the idea of seeing you again. He wondered if you hated him, but he wouldn’t blame you if you did. In fact, Peter hated himself. He felt as if somehow it was his fault for what had happened, he felt as if he should have let you go during the fight, not webbing you to the floor so you could be taken to a jail out in the ocean.

He knew how much you hated oceans.

Tony had called him the second he returned the raft. All the info he gave Peter was that it wasn’t a pretty sight, which sent Peter further down his downward spiral. When Natasha announced that they had arrived, Peter was the first one up and ready, clad in his distinct red-suit. The three of them managed to take down the guards and make their way into the main quarters of the jail. He scanned the cells till he found yours.

Holy shit.

Peter had been prepping himself for the worst, but this was far past bad.

You looked terrible.

He immediately opened your cell door and crouched by your body.

“Y/N?” Your eyes continued to stare straight ahead as Peter ripped off his mask. “Y/N?” He repeated, putting a hand on his shoulder. You let out a scream and tried to back away repeating the word no over and over again. “Hey Y/N, it’s just me. It’s just Peter,” he repeated until your eyes found his. He could see the relief in your eyes as they started to fill with tears.

“Peter,” you breathed as he hacked away at your straight jacket and collar, throwing them to the side. A sound of pure joy left your mouth as Peter pulled you in for a gentle hug, not wanting to injure you any further.

“I am so sorry, Y/N,” Peter cried out, burying his face in your hair. Your arms tentatively wrapped around him as you ignored the screaming pain from your body.

“S’ not your fault,” you whispered.

“I love you so much,” he mumbled, not wanting to let you go.

“Come on! We need to go, now!” Steve barked, looking at the two of you. They let you and Peter have their moment as they rescued the other members, everyone insisting that they were okay and could walk themselves.

Peter turned to you, “Can you walk?” You hesitantly tried to stand but started to collapse the second you put weight on your shaky legs. Peter caught you before you hit the floor, scooping you up into your arms and running away from the horrid scene. He took you into the plane, shielding you from the salty spray of the ocean as he buckled you into the seat of the plane, trying to make sure you were as comfortable as you could be.

“Peter?” You asked, your eyes starting to close from the weight of exhaustion and pain.

He turned to you as you reached out a hand and placed it on his cheek.

“I love you too.”

With that, Peter swore to never let anything ever come between the two of you again.

He stayed by your side the entire recovery process both physically and mentally. Peter realized that recovery was not linear and that you were going to have days where you seemed to get worse and worse, and he was prepared. He gave you anything you needed, from silence and cuddles to kisses and someone to vent to.

Peter Parker was a good soul, even if he had his moments.


	5. the audacity of peter parker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my lovely friends!! these are cross posted on my tumblr @starksmile !! please please PLEASE feel free to leave me a comment of how you liked it or if you didn't!!

originally posted:

Never in Peter Parker’s few years of living did he expect that he would be standing where he was; in the entryway to the Avengers compound. Tony Stark had invited the young teenager up to the place for a couple weeks to get him acquainted with some fellow Avengers and be given the space he needed to train, and boy, was Peter excited.

His foot anxiously tapped against the floor, a duffel bag thrown lazily over his shoulder. Fingers danced around his phone screen, shooting a quick text to Aunt May that he had arrived safely.

“Peter!” A voice yelled, startling him. He watched helplessly as his phone slipped through his fingers and landed with a crash on the floor.

“Oh shit!” Peter yelled, scooping up his now broken phone from the ground. “I didn’t mean to swear! I am so sorry Mr. Stark!” The older man raised an eyebrow at the sight.

“I don’t have all day, let’s go.” And with that, started to saunter away as Peter stumbled to get in tow. “So starting with some rules, you are to not leave the compound without telling me first, no touching the labs without my permission, and don’t fuck with FRIDAY. Oh and don’t go into the other member’s quarters, that’s creepy. I don’t care how big of a fan you are but-”

“Mr. Stark!” Peter exclaimed, a light blush settling into to his face. “I would never- I mean I wouldn’t- I uh- I won’t do that?” His voice squeaked at the end, causing Tony to let out a snort.

“Totally, so follow me and we can start our grand tour, but we need to hurry up. Plans with the lady” Soon the two fell into an even pace, side by side; Tony pointed out random things while Peter tried to create a mental map in his head. He started to worry about how he would ever learn where everything was, as it would be embarrassing to ask for directions.

“Stark!” Clint appeared out of nowhere, a pot of coffee in his hand. “Do you know where-” He paused when he saw Peter standing next to Tony, squinting his eyes in an attempt at what Peter guessed to intimidate him. “Who’s the kid?”

“Peter Parker, also known as Spider-Man.” Peter looked up to Stark, his eyes widened in surprise. “What?”

“My identity was supposed to be a secret!”

“Yeah to the world, the Avengers deserve to know-”

“We would have found out anyway,” Clint interjected. “Welcome to hell Parker.” With a roll of his eyes, Tony elbowed Clint in the stomach. In recoil, he spilled some of his coffee earning a groan from the archer. “You’re going to fucking pay Stark,” he growled.

“Shall we continue on?” Peter just blinked, unsure if he was dreaming or not.

“Did that just happen?” He questioned.

“You bet,” Tony sighed, straightening his posture. “Better get used to it.” They continued on with the tour, running into a few other Avengers along the way. The initial anxiety and fear began to wear off to the point that Peter was actually enjoying himself. I mean he actually had a normal conversation with Steve Rogers for crying out loud! Even though they were all superheroes, Peter remembered that for the most part, they were all humans. There was also some pretty cool tech that immediately caught the kid’s eye. Around every corner seemed to be something new and the yearn to mess around with it started to intensify to the point where his finger’s started to twitch, desperate to just touch the tech.

“Welcome to the common room!” Thor announced, somehow turning into the tour guide along the duration of the tour.

“That was supposed to my line, you stole my thunder! Ha, get it? Because you’re the god of thunder.” Tony was met with a silence from Thor.

“Your humor is inferior to mine, your joke was not funny.” Tony’s lips twitched down into a frown.

“Anyhow, you are free to come here honestly whenever. There is always at least one person here and don’t fucking touch my coffee machine. Also, clean up your dishes, I don’t want to see them collecting on my counter. And- hey, are you even listening to me?”

Peter was not listening, instead, he was too focused on the figure that was sprawled out on the couch.

Holy shit.

Peter had never seen someone as gorgeous as you in his life.

Surely this was a dream now?

You were quietly humming a song, a computer perched on your lap as your eyes scanned whatever lit up the screen. You were clearly intrigued by what you were looking at, as your forehead creased in concentration and you bit a part of your lip. Bucky Barnes sat next to you, reading a book and joining in on your humming. The two of you were oblivious to the new people in the room.

“Bucky!” You shouted, eyes now up from your computer and glaring at the super-soldier next you.

“What did I do?” He raised his hands in surrender. The sight was pretty damn adorable, a huge, menacing figure surrendering to a soft teenage girl.

“You stole part of the blanket, I was warm!” You pouted, arms folding over in front of you to announce your anger.

“Sucks to be you, I’m cold,” Bucky shrugged, shifting his gaze back to the book in front of you.

“I will not hesitate to sick Rogers on your ass.” Your lips tugged up into the cutest smile Peter had ever seen in his life. His heart practically melted at the sight of it.

“You wouldn’t dare.” Bucky’s eyes narrowed as your smile grew in size.

“Steve!” You shouted, throwing the computer off of your lap and making an attempt of jumping over the couch. Your eyes met his for a split second before you were tugged back to the couch by Bucky, his fingers immediately attacking your sides causing you to start laughing and trying to push him off.

Again, you were the cutest thing that Peter had ever seen in his life.

“You are going to pay for this, Y/N.”

So that was your name, Y/N. It suited you, a perfect name for a perfect girl.

Peter watched in awe as you flipped Bucky off of you and to the ground, holding his arm with a smirk.

“I will always win, James.” With that, you let him go as his body went slack.

“I let you win,” Bucky mumbled, picking himself off of the ground as you walked over to where Peter was standing.

“Hi, I don’t recognize you,” you laughed. “Who is he?” You turned to the two figures standing next to you.

“P-Peter Parker,” he stuttered, awkwardly extending his hand to you. You giggled and pulled him in for a hug. Jesus Christ, even your hugs were perfect.

“I’m Y/N!” You smiled, stepping back from the hug to get a good look at the teenager. He looked to be about your age, and he was hella cute. “Out of curiosity though, why are you here?”

“Oh- I- I um- I you know-” Peter stammered, at a loss for what to say. Of course, he would freak out in front of a pretty girl, versus Captian fucking America.

“He is Spider-Man,” Your father answered for him earning a squeal escape your lips.

“Holy shit! Your Spider-Man?” A child-like wonder coursed through your veins, filling you with an inexplicable happiness.

“Yeah,” Peter said, this time a slight bit more confident.

“Dude, I am like the biggest Spider-Man fan! Don’t tell anyone else, but I think you’re my favorite superhero.” You giggled, making Peter’s heart swell to five times its normal size.

“Well I am offended,” Tony muttered, his hand clutching his chest in hurt.

“Hush up, old man. Iron Man is the worst, but I have to say, Thor is probably my second favorite,” you smirked, sending a wink in Thor’s direction.

“Rightfully so, Lady Y/N. Thor is the mightiest Avenger.”

“That’s a joke,” Natasha snorted, waltzing into the room like the goddess that she is.

“I have like fifteen billion questions for you,” you beamed, turning back to Peter.

“I would be happy to answer them,” Peter smiled, his confidence growing with every second.

Of course, you liked Spider-Man, he was pretty damn cool.

“Do the webs like,” you paused, looking for the right wording for the question. “Do they like come from inside you?”

The rest of the group burst out into laughter, as Peter started to blush again.

“No, they’re artificial. I actually made them myself,” he admitted, you let out another giggle.

Did Peter mention that he had a thing for girl’s who giggled?

“You’re cute when you giggle,” Peter laughed before realizing what he said. His hand instantly slapped over his mouth, regretting the creepy words immediately. God damn it, he had known you for a total of three seconds and had already fucked it up. “I am so sorry, I didn’t mean that to sound creepy and I-”

“It’s okay!” You interrupted, the smile on your face growing bigger. “You’re pretty handsome, yourself.”

Tony didn’t know what to do.

This was new territory for him, no one dared to flirt with his daughter in fear of the repercussions from him.

So he just sat there, his jaw practically on the floor.

Peter Parker had the audacity to flirt with his daughter?

Yeah, no way.

“Looks like there is a new suiter for your daughter, will they wed immediately?” Thor whispered, a proud smile on his face as he leaned in towards Tony.

“Yeah, nope, not happening,” he stepped forward to where the teenagers were talking and giggling.

God, the giggling.

“This,” he motioned with his hands to the two of you. “Is canceled, say your goodbyes now. New rule: you are not allowed to flirt or even look at my daughter again.” Tony smirked as he watched Peter’s face morph into a pool of shock and horror.

“Your- Your daughter?” Peter shrieked, turning to you.

“Wow, way to be a cockblock dad.” You glared at him, before turning back to Peter. “See you around, cutie.” You shot him a wink before spinning on your feet and leaving the room.

“They would have been so cute together! God damn Stark, we approved of them,” Clint pouted, his arm slung around Natasha.

“Are you her father?” Tony huffed.

“Well if you died in a firey accident, then-” He was cut off by a slap on his head from Bucky.

“I would be the next in line for that, sorry,” Bucky laughed, pouring himself a cup of Clint’s coffee.

“Actually I am pretty sure Nat or I would be, but okay. You do you.”

“Can we not talk about my death?” Tony spoke through gritted teeth.

Was this really happening?

Was Peter Parker really watching this happen?

But more importantly, Tony Stark had a daughter?

And did he really have a crush on her?

“I’m just going to- I’m just going to go. Thanks for the uh- the tour,” Peter mumbled, a chorus of goodbyes echoing after him. He got lost in the sea of thoughts as he searched for the room Tony had previously shown him. He pushed the door of the room open and took a deep breath, trying to come to terms with reality. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, frowning at the broken screen.

‘Ned, I have an emergency’ - penis parker

'what’s up my man?’ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'hey, aren’t you with the Avengers? how is Wanda in real life? everything we dreamed of?“ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'haven’t met her yet, but tony stark has a daughter’ - penis parker

'NO FUcKiNG WAY, PETER HOLY SHIT’ - the coolest sidekick crime-fighting bitch i know

'yeah i know, but that isn’t the worst part…’ - penis parker

'omg did you kill her?’ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'dude, what? no.’ - penis parker

'oOooo’ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'i think i might have a crush on her???? idk????’ - penis parker

"Peter?” For the second time today, Peter became so startled he dropped his phone. “Oh shit, sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you!”

“It’s fine,” Peter huffed, looking up at the person who damaged his phone. Needless to say, he was surprised by who was standing there.

“Y/N?”

“The one and only,” you laughed. “Mind if I come in?” Peter nodded his head, motioning you in.

“Nice room. Of course, he would give you the best room besides his own,” you laughed, looking around the decked out room.

“Sorry?”

“Nothing to be sorry about, it’s just kind of funny,” you trailed off, getting lost in your own thoughts. “Oh yeah! I wanted to see if you wanted to go get dinner or something. And we could watch a movie when we get back!” Peter bit his lip, thinking about the consequences if went along. “Please tell me that my dad didn’t scare you off? Isn’t Spider-Man not scared of anything?”

“You know I’m not Spider-Man, just Peter Parker,” he looked down to his fingers fiddling in his lap.

“Hey,” you spoke softly, laying your hand down on the teen’s shoulders making Peter’s heart melt even more. “I bet Spider-Man isn’t half as cool as Peter Parker, I would actually quite like to get to know him.” His eyes gazed up to meet your warm, inviting ones. “I don’t know if you like thai, but if you do, I know a really good place just down the road. I also know the best windows to sneak out of, so I could also gladly show you them.” Peter was silent for a second.

“I love thai.” With that, you were gone, yelling to him something about meeting you in your room in like ten minutes.

Peter sat there in shock for a good few minutes, before the buzzing of his phone brought him back to reality.

'DUDE’ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'nO. PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING?!’ - the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'STARK IS GOING TO MURDER YOU!!!!!’ – the coolest crime-fighting sidekick bitch i know

'it will be worth it (-:’ - penis parker

wait.

where was your room?


	6. xanax and field trips

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my lovely friends!! as always,,, these are cross-posted to my tumblr @starksmile so check it out if you would like!! also PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave a comment and tell me how you liked it!! <3

originally published: 5-4-18

Peter Parker had always been a fan of field trips.

It started out when his first-grade class took a trip to the Queens Zoo. There he gaped with wide eyes, taking in the sights of the animals of all shapes in sizes. His grubby little hands gripped as tight as humanly possible on the metal bars, separating the young child from the animals. All he wanted to do was run his hands through the soft fur of the giant cat looking thing, but he was scolded his teacher again and again, till his stubborn little self finally gave up. That fateful Wednesday sprung a new love for animals on the doe-eyed child, a phase that didn’t seem to end until he was 10 years old, much to May’s relief. It was cute at first as Peter would cuddle a stuffed cat to his chest, refusing to put it down for anything. But as the years passed on, Peter would throw animal facts at poor May whenever he possibly could and the whole animal obsession became a little less cute.

He had never had a bad field trip and was incredibly grateful for it, as his school took them to places that were actually interesting to the teenage demographic. But that was all to change after Peter’s physics teacher announced the location of their next outing.

“The labs of the new esteemed Avengers compound!” Peter’s heart dropped.

No. Fucking. Way.

Peter just stared at the teacher with a look of disbelief, the students around him breaking out into cheers of triumph and excitement. For them, it was the best school-related news in forever. I mean a tour of the labs for the heroes who protect their city instead of twiddling pencils for two hours in a stuffy classroom? Hell yeah! But for Peter, it sounded quite like hell on earth. The thought of his biggest secret possibly getting exposed while being embarrassed in front of his classmates by the people he was supposed to call his teammates, made him physically ill to his stomach.

Holy shit.

He nearly forgot about the small fact that his girlfriend lived there.

Ned shot his friend a wary glance as Peter thrust his head into his hands, trying to ward off the upcoming headache that was starting to plant its roots in his head, slowly starting to consume him.

“Peter?” Ned asked, laying his hand on the anxious teenager’s shoulder, trying to ground him. Peter nodded in response, not even lifting his head buried deep in his hands. “How are you doing, dude?”

“Fucking fantastic,” he mumbled, frowning slightly to himself.

“Hey, what’s up with Parker? No more dick to suck?” Flash laughed lightly to himself, making his way over to the two of them, the bell ringing softly in the background. 

“That was isn’t even creative, dude. And besides, you do know he has a girlfriend?” Ned retorted, glaring at him. Flash’s self-confidence went through a flicker of darkness, as his face scrunched. He quickly replaced it with a cocky grin.

“Oh really,” he smirked. “What’s her name then?”

“Y/N!” Ned blurted out, eliciting a groan from Peter.

“Pretty sure there isn’t a Y/N in the school,” Flash laughed, clearly enjoying himself. Ned looked over to Peter for help, his head appearing out of his hands.

“She doesn’t uh- she doesn’t go here?” Peter squeaked, mentally slapping himself for making it sound like a question. Flash couldn’t help but to laugh.

“Jesus Penis, you are really shitty at lying. Never be-”

“He is dating Y/N Stark!” Ned blurted out. Both Flash and Peter turned to look at Ned, all eyes narrowed in anger.

“You’re trying to tell me that this nerdy, asshole is somehow dating Y/N fucking Stark? Like the badass daughter of Tony Stark? How stupid do you think I am?” Flash glared, sizing the two boys up as they cowered down in fear. “First the internship now this BS? You two are in for it now,” he laughed causing Ned and Peter to share a look of horror. “Watch your back.” And with that, Flash left the two to their own devices.

“Come on, man!” Peter yelled, throwing his hands up in the air.

“I’m sorry! It just slipped out!” Ned apologized, looking genuinely sorry thus making Peter mad at himself for getting mad at Ned. He knew Ned had meant no harm by the matter.

“It’s fine,” Peter grumbled, picking up his papers from the dark lab tables and shoving them into his backpack. “Let’s just get out of here.”

They both grabbed a permission slip before leaving the classroom, eyes darting around the hallway to look for any signs of Flash and his posy.

Jesus Christ, Peter felt as if he was trapped in a high school movie.

Wednesday could not have come any faster. Peter spent every second leading up to pleading with his aunt to let him stay home. She wouldn’t budge, claiming that if he even thought of skipping or faking sick she would take away his costume for a month. That seemed to shut Peter up real quick. He spent the moments where he wasn’t begging for his life, brainstorming ways to get through the six hours of hell. The more he thought about it, the less terrible the thought began to become. There was a slim to practically no chance they would even run into any members of the team there. They would be most likely to run into Bruce who would be too nervous to even talk to the large group of students nevertheless scope out Peter and embarrass him. All he had to do was not tell anyone he was coming.

Easy, right?

It wasn’t.

Peter sat there anxiously twiddling his thumbs as he awaited the arrival of the bleak yellow school bus ready to take him to the seventh circle of hell. Ned stood by him, a goofy grin on his face as he was actually excited for this. He had been talking both Peter and MJ’s ears off for the past few days once he realized that Peter was coming to terms with the day. He had planned his outfit on facetime with Peter the night before, double checking that he had space on his phone to take a ton of photos.

“-and maybe we will see someone of importance!” Ned gleamed as Peter groaned, watching the group of students file onto the yellow death trap buses in front of him.

“You do understand that that would actually be my worst nightmare?” Peter glanced back at Ned before stepping on the bus and taking a seat near the front, Ned sitting down next to him.

“Do you know if Y/N is there today? You should get her to come meet our class! I can just imagine the look on Flash’s-”

“Dude! No!” Peter practically screamed.

“Come on, Flash would stop the teasing and you would instantly become the coolest kid in school.”

Peter paused, thinking the idea over in his head. “Yeah, no not worth it. Besides, I don’t even think she would be up for it. I think her and Bucky were off to somewhere today.”

Ned’s eyes widened. “Bucky?”

“Yeah,” Peter cocked his head. “Winter Soldier? White Wolf? Brainwashed-”

“I know who Bucky is! Are you like actual friends with him? Have you touched his hair?” Peter leaned his head against the cool glass window, slipping in an earbud while Ned wasn’t looking. He let his mind wander off, eagerly taking any sort of peace he could get before the next few hours of hell. But a short buzz from his phone interrupted his moment.

y/n: hey cutie! what’s up!

Peter couldn’t help but to smile at the text.

peter: nm! just headed on a stupid field trip

peter: speaking of which, are you home rn??

y/n: yeah /-: bucky canceled our movie date bc steve wasn’t feeling well

y/n: and somehow steve somehow takes precedence over me

y/n: which is so offensive

peter: lmao u know he loves you too though

y/n: yeah yeah

y/n: so a field trip??? where to?

y/n: OMG WAIT ARE YOU WITH NED?!

y/n: TELL HIM I SAY HI

Peter couldn’t help the chuckle from escaping his lips. For some odd reason, you were slightly obsessed with Ned, which Ned ate right up.

“Y/N says hi,” Peter laughed, flashing Ned his phone screen.

“Tell her I say hi back! Ask if she can come say hi to me in front of the group! Like she doesn’t even have to acknowledge you, just me!” Ned blabbered, looking more like a four-year-old toddler than a sixteen-year-old teenager.

“You do know she doesn’t even know we are coming?”

Ned stared at him, jaw slightly askew. “You didn’t tell her?”

“Why would I? Then she would tell her dad, who would then tell everyone else, you see where I am going with this?” Peter sighed, ignoring the buzzing of his phone.

“But- But it’s Y/N,” Ned whined, mustering up his best puppy eyes. “Please?”

y/n: hey you little shit don’t leave me on read

peter: ned says hi back

peter: and uh… about the field trip…. we are maybe going to the labs at the compound???

y/n: are you joking? peter benjamin parker please tell me you are joking

peter: afraid not, can you please not tell anyone else about this?? i don’t want my secret to be exposed somehow

y/n: yeah of course! how much of a dick do you think i am? but as long as i get to come down and say hi to my fav person ever!!

peter: number one, you are a stark… so that answers the first question. also, you do know you can call me like any time to say hi???

y/n: oh.

y/n: this is awkward…

y/n: i was talking about ned….

peter: fuck you

y/n: ily!!! i am heading down to the labs rn, i can hook your class up with the best tour guide

peter: k c ya then!!! (-:

“So?” Ned pushed, trying to get a look at Peter’s text messages.

Peter closed his eyes, trying to come to terms to what he just got himself into. “She will be making an appearance.”

“Yes!” Ned screamed, earning him a parade of dirty looks from his fellow classmates but he was too excited to care. For the next fifty minutes, Ned talked and talked and talked as Peter tried to focus on the horizon.

What did he just do?

“Remember, we are representing Midtown High School, so please be respectful,” Peter’s physics teacher announced, as his class filed from the bus, a buzz of excitement in the air. The hoard of students flocked in the entryway of the building, straining their heads to get a good look at the building. Peter strayed away from the group, walking a good few paces behind the group, Ned gawking at his side.

“Holy shit!” Ned exclaimed. “This is awesome!”

“Wait till you see the inside,” Peter smiled at his best friend’s excitement. He realized on the way over here, that not everyone got to experience what he got to see on a day to day basis.

“Is that Bruce Banner?” Peter heard someone exclaim.

Oh no.

Peter pushed his way his way past his squealing peers to find an uncomfortable Bruce Banner awkwardly shuffling from side to side. His left eye twitched as he scanned the overwhelming crowd of students, looking for one person in particular.

“Peter,” Bruce breathed, looking slightly calmer than before.

“Hi, Mr. Banner. How did you know I was coming?” Peter asked, well aware of the twenty-three pairs of eyes focused on the back of his head.

Bruce twiddled with his thumbs still shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Y/N begged me to step up as a tour guide. I didn’t want to but then Natasha asked me to because it would apparently ‘help my social skills’, and I can’t say no to Natasha,” he rambled on, now fidgeting with his glasses.

“Yeah, she is scary when she is mad,” Peter giggled, running a hand through his curls.

Wow, how they both could benefit from some Xanax.

“So- uh- I guess I’ll let you start.” He fell back in into the crowd of students, all eyes glancing between the teenager and the doctor.

“Hi, everyone. I-I’m Banner. Doctor Banner to be exact and I guess I am supposed to show you around the lab? So I guess we can start with the lower-”

“Dr. Banner?” Flash yelled, interrupting Bruce midsentence.

“Yeah?” He motioned to Flash, signaling for him to continue.

“How do you know Parker over here?” Peter could practically see the loss of words run through Bruce’s face.

“He-he uh- Peter works here,” Bruce trailed off, looking to Peter for some type of support.

“Yeah,” Peter squeaked, avoiding the gaze of Flash.

“I think that is enough Mr. Thompson,” His teacher scolded as Flash continued to glare at him. “Please continue Dr. Banner.”

Peter stayed as far away as possible from Flash for the next hour. As on edge and anxious as Peter was from what was to come, he found himself enjoying the tour a little. Peter hadn’t ever seen the entire labs, and something about Bruce explaining it made it a hundred times better. Once the class wore off from the burst of excitement, everyone quieted down, actually interested in what Bruce had to say.

Because they were all nerds.

Bruce led the group into the next room where Peter noticed a figure sitting in a lone chair, leg bouncing up and down and a pen in your mouth.

“And here we have a natural Y/N in her habitat,” Bruce chuckled, trying to crack a joke. Your head shot up, a grin plastered on your face.

“Are you Y/N Stark?” The girl next to exclaimed, clearly starstruck by the teenager in front of her.

“Yes, I am! The best Stark actually,” you smiled, eyes darting around the crowd.

“But what about Tony-”

You laughed before cutting the person off, “Screw him. I am overall the best one. Hey, Ned!”

Ned’s eyes widened for what felt like the twentieth time that day.

“Y/N!” He exclaimed as you walked over to you, all eyes following you.

“And here we have,” Bruce continued, but no one seemed to care all attention diverted to you.

“Hey man! What’s up?” You smiled, extending your hand to do your special handshake. Ned grinned returning the action, clearly excited to be racking up the cool points.

“Nothing much, how have you been?” You could hear all the whispers from around them but you ignored them, excited to be talking with your friend.

“I’ve been okay! I was supposed to go see this movie with Bucky today, but Steve just had to get sick so now I’m stuck here. I can now see I’m not loved though,” you sighed shifting your attention to the doe-eyed teenager next to him.

“Parker,” you smirked.

“Little Stark,” Peter couldn’t help the grin from taking over his face.

Peter swore you got prettier every time he saw you.

You embraced the teenager, holding him close before going up on your tiptoes and placing a small peck on his lips.

“I missed you, cutie!”

“I missed you too, Y/N/N!” Out of the corner of your eyes, you could see a teenager inch his way closer to the two of you.

“You’re actually dating Penis Parker?” Flash sneered, a look of disgust on his face. Peter watched your eyes flash up in anger as he layed his hand on his shoulder trying to communicate that it didn’t matter.

“What did you just call him?” You asked, eyes narrowing as your arms folded over your chest.

A silence fell upon the room.

Flash gulped, backing away slightly.

“Why are you with Penis Parker? You could do better,” Flash announced, trying to size you up.

You laughed, “Do you really think you can call my boyfriend that? You do know who I am right?”

Flash nodded, “What are you going to do about it?” He paused, looking directly at you. “Bitch.”

Someone gasped but you just continued to laugh.

“I’m the bitch? I’m not the one who cowards behind a cool-boy facade and bullys other kids just because they’re insecure of who they really are. I’m not the one who makes other student’s lives a living hell at school. I’m not the one who is struggling to pass physics, isn’t that right Flash?” You smirked, leaving the whole entire room speechless.

“How- How do you know my name?” Flash questioned, eyes darting around, not wanting to meet yours.

“I know a lot about you Flash, and if you dare even thinking about fucking around with Peter again, I will not hesitate to release the wrath of the Avengers on your sorry ass. I am so glad we had this little talk! Now go back with your classmates to hear Uncle Brucie talk about his nerdy shit!” You grabbed Peter’s hand before leading out of the shocked room.

“Hey,” he breathed, not sure of what to say.

“Hi!” You grinned.

“That was… Wow.”

“If he ever bothers you again, I will personally beat his ass to the ground.”

Peter pulled you in for a hug, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“I know you would.”

Has Peter ever mentioned how hot his girlfriend was when she was angry?


End file.
